indecisiveness.

you could describe me as indecisive.

i always need change, yet beg for consistency.

obviously, this is a problem.

*if you ask me to pick either McDonald's or Del Taco for lunch and happen to be on either side of the light, i couldn't tell you.

*i can't decide if i want long or short hair.

*when it comes to outfit picking, it's often a morning crisis.

or even a song that describes the current mood.  could make it down to maybe 5 or 6, never the one.
and lets not even talk about who i like.  the number skyrockets every other day.

the only favorites i have are Oreos and the color blue.

as a result of my obvious indecisiveness, I can't remember where I was going with this post.

so...

as a huge side note....

I hate the feeling of knowing you're mature.  and that the most important thing in your life changes from your friends to school, college, family, and your future.  the most exciting parts of my week include finishing studying for tests before midnight, and receiving my license in the mail.  I guess friday night football games don't bring me as much happiness as I expected them to, just like they used to.  Maybe it's because my friends don't care that I'm there, maybe it's because I don't feel missed when I miss my friends I don't see anymore, they don't miss me back.

I took for granted all of my friendships.

I want to make the most of the time when I do get to see them on the weekends.

Apparently, they don't care as much as I do.  

knowing me,

I am yet again sick of the look of this blog.

it no longer has such a cosmetic appeal as it did for the two seconds I had it at first.

I'm quite an indecisive person.

please, don't hate me while I change it once more.

words to never be said.

I think we often take certain words for granted.

--Thank You.
This can never be said enough times.  Being really truly grateful for something should be the only time this is said.  I believe it is totally and completely undermined in meaning, along with these other three.  An  overused word loses value.  I want someone to really feel appreciated when I tell them "Thank You." because in reality, it did mean something very important to me.

--I'm Sorry.
I abuse this statement entirely too often.  Often times in a situation you do one of a few things: do something you shouldn't have. accidentally hurt/cause harm to something/someone. mess up. etc.
Behaviors and actions are dismissed by saying "I'm Sorry."  Sorry means you feel guilt.  Hurt by your actions.  Disappointed.  And willing to never do what you did again.  Saying "I'm sorry" for stealing something of your friends, or for breaking something, or for saying something rude DOESN'T CUT IT. Only if you really mean that you are never willing to do that sort of thing again, should you say it.  Mean what you say, and say what you mean.

--I Love You.
I can't push this one enough.  Don't ever tell someone you love them unless your over the age of 18.  Get out of high school and realize that you aren't in love.  Realize that just because someone says "I Love You" and "You mean so much to me" means they've probably said it to people before you, and will after you're gone.  Get used to the fact that it most likely doesn't mean anything.
Love is something you grow into, lust and infatuation is something entirely different, and is what the large majority of high school relationships is.  The people you love are your best friends for life who you could never live without and your family.  Of course this entire situation changes when you get out of high school and mature, but geared towards the high school going crowd, I suggest you don't use this phrase.

--I Promise.
Don't ever use this unless you will 100% not back down from what you say.  There's a lot of ways you can get across the message that you want to without promising.


And that is all I have to say.  

Choose your words wisely, they make all the difference.

I came to dance.

alright,

the awaited pictures are here :)

HOMECOMING with Cam McGinn was absolutely amazing.  The best night of my life for a long time, and the best date that I have ever had!  For our day date we went ice-skating, which was so fun! I enjoyed every minute of it :)

got it on all by myself!! no help at all. I'm professional, what can I say.

me and Cam :)

had the most beautiful corsage, love it so much!  He picked the best one :)

Homecoming was absolutely amazing, thank you Cam! It will be one that I will never forget.

Dance #2.

Homecoming #2?

I guess it pays off to go to another school :)

Mr. Unknown filled my car with balloons and made me pop them all to find his name! 

We were at a Volleyball game.  Their cover was to make me go, and that my friend had to "change her shirt in my car."  Haha. Clever.  Tonight was good :)

untitled.

Labor Day weekend was not what I planned

But good things came about, as always.

We went with our cousins hiking up to Stewart Falls and all around up at Sundance Ski Resort.  Lots of fun trails to hike in the summer, even though it gets flooded with people on holidays.

Here's for you to enjoy.

my sweet cousin Kaitlin.  She is a gem :)

me, my brother Adam (in the green), and the cousins.

probably took them 5 minutes to get one picture.

just about fell. haha.

the bunch of us about to cross the river.

Along with this lovely day full of hiking, something incredible happened.

You know what that is?

It's a parking pass.

Do you know what that means?

Yes. I got my license!!

the disadvantages of being nice.

While I was still attending good old Timpanogos High, my English teacher started a class discussion on

the disadvantages of being nice.

Wait.  How could there possibly be disadvantages of being nice to someone?  Oh, there are so many.  It's an extremely logical point of view, if you ask me.  After our intriguing discussion, we were assigned to write a paragraph on the said title above.  Consequently, I was unable to turn my paragraph in.  I thought I carried a good argument.  So, as to no further adieu, here it is.

The Disadvantages of Being Nice

     For centuries, the human race has been taught and raised to act kindly to others.  However, this creates implications to every day life; it impairs emotions, personal opinions, relationships with others, and leaves negative impressions.  As in an act of kindness one chooses to talk to a slightly awkward individual, the consequence of this kind act turns into the "shiny new toy" outcome.  This awkward individual now thinks a new friend came about because someone proved "kind" enough to carry on a small yet quite uncomfortable conversation.  As another example, if approached by a person dressed quite outlandish and asks, "Does this outfit look good?", and it obviously doesn't, the kind thing would result in an answer like, "Why yes of course it does!", when really, the opposite opinion is the truth.  This kindness in fact questions and changes one's veracity, and people lost trust in this person's opinion.  Other disadvantages can but not always include damaged relationships, along with negative impressions.  Fake people never succeed, and nice guys finish last.

social butterfly?

I am quite the social butterfly, if you know me at all.
I'm constantly surrounded by people.  Not to totally be bragging about anything, its just my personality.
I'm most comfortable around friends; I think most people are.

Nevertheless,

my social life has disappeared completely.

but,

I think that I am in the right place that I need to be in my life.

I really could never see myself leaving my friends and my entire social life; but now that I have temporarily, I have come across the advantages of this.

Not only do I have time to study, but I really get things out of the class, rather than thinking about my friends in the class, not focusing, and letting my mind wander.

I stopped feeling uncomfortable with the teachers and students in my class yesterday; I suddenly realized that it really wasn't that bad.
I kind of think that this is what college is going to be like.

You are just with a bunch of other students who want to be learning the most they can. (For the most part.. there's always an exception to everything.)  I started to notice myself realizing that I honestly didn't care if no one texted me after school, or even in school.  I stopped caring if no one talked to me in class, and just cared that I was there to learn.

I think college will be a lot like that too.

This leaves a lot more room for coming into your own; in some other people's words; a flower coming into bloom.

I realized life isn't about your friends today.

Because I can still be happy without them.

Here's something for you to enjoy.

I love this.

Even though I'm not a fan of tattoos, I definitely think this one is cool; there's a sort of sentimental value to it.

Have no fear, people.  Someone's always there to watch out for you. :)